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Tuesday, 27 September 2022

[New post] We Can’t Always Be Smart

Site logo image Feminina O'Ladybrain posted: " Spoilers for some Foundation material in Control I'm never going to finish this game, not for lack of playing time (well, some of that) but because I am stupid.  I had time today!  I played!  I was SO STUPID.  Did a fight first.  Won it in s" Play First. Talk Later.

We Can't Always Be Smart

Feminina O'Ladybrain

Sep 27

Spoilers for some Foundation material in Control

Butch:

I'm never going to finish this game, not for lack of playing time (well, some of that) but because I am stupid. 

I had time today!  I played!  I was SO STUPID. 

Did a fight first.  Won it in style.  Felt good.  Felt fine. 

Then, there was one of those "here's a big open place.  Here's a yellow thing that says 'go here.'  Here's a ledge to pull out" deals.  OK, fine.  Ledge, head for the yellow thing. Cool. 

Could NOT get to the yellow thing.  Died over and over and over and over.  Kept looking for another ledge.  There was no other ledge. 

After some altogether too damn long amount of time, went to the internet for a walk through.  Watched the walkthrough until the fight I won and, wouldn't you know, the guy went the other way into the tower!  

Stopped watching the walkthrough.  This will become important in a paragraph or two. 

Found a note, hit the elevator button....couldn't find anything else to do.  "Well shit," thought I, "the guy in the walkthrough went here.  Here is where to go."  Spent easily, easily twenty minutes looking around, jumping, moving things. 

Gave up.  Went back to the walkthrough. 

Had I watched about thirty seconds more of the walkthrough, I would have learned that that was only a way to go to get the note.  Then, you go BACK to where there was that ledge and that yellow thing.  

"OK, brainiac," I said to the walkthrough, "let's see you do this."  

Brainiac jumped, pulled out the ledge, landed, then very casually jumped and glided to the very obvious ledge to the right of the yellow thing.  

It was right there.  RIGHT.  THERE.  

I swear, all that was 45 minutes of play time.  It was right the hell in front of me. 

I was so mad.  But I soldiered on!  "I must be close to the end of this quest," thought I.  And I was.  The next bits were easy.  Shoot nodes, go up, another cake fight.  Phew!  Done!  All I have to do is free up this ball........

I could not free up the fucking ball. 

Took me forever to figure out I had to free it then fix it.  

Took me forever to get the timing.  

Took me a whole mess of forever to realize there was a part you had to fix on top of the fucking ball.  

It took me thirty minutes to free the ball.  Not kidding.  Thirty minutes. 

This shit should've taken me, or anyone, about fifteen minutes.  Took me two damn hours. 

I can't even. 

Feminina:

Man, that "freeing and fixing the ball" thing took me forever too. I kept going around and around, blasting this and fixing that, over and over, always missing some key part, never quite able to sort out the right order for the steps. Eventually I stumbled on it through sheer dumb luck. It was kind of maddening. 

And the warehouse tower was tough. Lots of confusing ledges and levels and elevator stops. It took ME a stupidly long time to figure out how to break that one node that was kind of inside the elevator cage. 

But here we both are, at last!

Butch:

And our reward was....uh...the board saying "don't trust Former?" 

Not really a plot twist, that. 

I'm glad my stupid wasn't just me.  But damn, that was a waste of game time and then some.  I could've done so much more! 

Speaking of more: finding all that shit for Emily so I can get into a lab under the warehouse.  Worth it? 

Feminina:

Hm. There's some fighting involved (!?!) and a bit of story. Nothing that will make you say "ah-ha, THAT explains everything at last!" But some information. 

Butch:

Are they a pain in the ass to find?  I don't want something that's a pain in the ass to find. I need escapism. 

Because, in other news, my mother seems to have gone totally off the rails.  I'm likely going to have to stop talking to her and tell her to stay the fuck away from my kids, like my brother did last year.   Like, can I get a break?  Can I have some time without stress? 

Feminina:

How many do you have so far? The last one was kind of a pain, but not because it's hard to get, just because I didn't think to wander around outside the tower. Most of them are on different levels in the tower, so you just have to make sure to go through all the windows.

Butch:

Uh...I have two? 

Feminina:

Enh, you'll get there. Or not.

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